Shopping Cart Series: Caught Red-Carted?

Here I am trembling in the corner. But, I swear to you. I’m not involved in the graffiti  that’s been plaguing Sheepshead Bay.

When something bad happens, they always come looking for the brightest colored cart around. I know — because it’s happened, before. The last time there was some vandalism, they rounded up a bunch of us carts and wheeled us over to the police lineup. The witness fingered me and I was taken into custody, read my Miranda rights, and put on trial. I couldn’t afford an attorney, so they assigned me one from legal aid. Although I was innocent, law enforcement told me I was going to the slammer for a long time.

It was my lawyer’s first case and he was hungry for that first victory. He got the witness to admit that she was actually COLOR-BLIND! There was no way she could have known I was red, unless someone had told her. The witness broke down in tears, confessing that the real culprits threatened to run her down if she didn’t testify falsely against me!

It felt great to be free, again, but being falsely accused and put on trial traumatized me for the rest of my life.