When I was a kid sitting in the back seat of my old man’s car on a long road trip, every time we got stuck in traffic I thought of one thing. Wings.
If we had wings we could go up and over these jerkwads in our way. They would unfold only in times of need, a secret to be revealed only in those situations when major highways were turned into parking lots. Or if there was light traffic and I needed to pee. But I digress, the point is that you don’t want to draw too much attention to your wings. Then everyone would have wings, and the jerkwads would still end up being in your way.
I figure many kids (and adults) have similar traffic-relief fantasies. It could be wings, like me, or perhaps teleporters. Maybe giant wheels to just drive over everyone in your way.
Or maybe, maybe, you envisioned a car that could tunnel underground.
Well, to those in the last category, I’m here to tell you: the dream lives! I mean, just look at that photo. Clearly that’s what this guy was trying to do with his car on Brighton 4th Street and Brighton Beach Avenue. People were in his way, and he figured he’d go underground. His car must have stalled or something, but his secret is out.
Or, the more rational – and alarming – explanation is that the sewer grate on this corner is missing for some reason, and this poor sap had the misfortune of driving over it.
But how’d that grate get off, potentially leading to serious injury (imagine if a senior had mistakenly stepped there instead of the car)? According to our tipster, someone at the scene told him that someone dropped their cell phone into the sewer last night, removed the cover to retrieve it, and never replaced it. I’m not sure if I believe that, given how heavy those covers are, but if there’s security footage of this guy leaving it like that, then he ought to be found and prosecuted.