Coney Island’s Astrotower Nothing More Than A 5-Foot Stump

The “Big Bagel in the Sky” has been reduced to a discarded muffin stump on the ground. Those who were spooked enough by the swaying Astrotower last week apparently had cause to be concern, despite our doubts, as officials deemed it necessary to bring the whole thing down.

News 12 reported that the tower, which has stood more than 270-feet tall since the early 1960s, has been reduced to a five-foot stump. No immediate plans have been drawn up to replace the thing but let me be the first to suggest a crazy new idea: how about a new 275-foot tower designed to sway dramatically in the wind?

You could call it the ‘Windy Needle’ or better yet, the ‘Ghost of the Astrotower’! Of course, this tower would only feign toppling over.

Do you have a better idea? I doubt it because mine is the best ever…