Ugly Emmons Space Brings In Big Bucks

In the fight to make a better waterfront, most argue that if residential homes are torn down, they ought to be replaced with something to compliment the marina. Be it bait and tackle shops or lively nightlife, that’s what’s called for, and that’s why the Sheepshead Bay Special Zoning District exists.

Unfortunately, there is no provision to ensure that people don’t tear down an Emmons Avenue bungalow and build an ugly piece of shit. Case in point? 3101 Emmons Avenue, which sold on January 14 for an astounding $1.75 million.

The newly constructed commercial unit replaces a bungalow house with 5,050 square feet of fugly, featuring a mezzanine with no view. Judging from the design, and some insider whispering, it will most likely go to some sort of bar/restaurant/lounge use. Which is cool. Except that it’s ugly.

We’re a little surprised by the high selling price of this thing (a whopping $350 per square foot), but, hey, even in a depression it’s always a seller’s market for cold, ambiguous steel doors on phallic, beige utility shafts.