Remembering Barbara Henderson

Barbara Marucci Henderson, lifelong Park Slope resident, SFX Youth Sports treasurer, and co-commissioner of SFX Flag Football, passed away on April 21, 2013. She was 56 years old.

“She was my soulmate,” Tom Henderson, Barbara’s husband said. They met on February 6, 1981 through a mutual friend. “Instantaneously we were comfortable together. She was my life partner. She was someone to depend on.” Indeed, their friends think of them not as two separate people but as a Tom-and-Barbara unit.

Barbara lived nearly her entire life in Park Slope. Not long after Barbara’s first birthday, her parents, Dorothy and Joseph Marucci, moved into an apartment on 8th Ave and 10th Street. Tom and Barbara ultimately raised their son, Tom Jr., in the same apartment.

Barbara could walk from her home to her schools, St. Saviour Elementary School and then St. High School. Later she graduated from John Jay College of Criminal Justice.

“Barbara lived in Park Slope when it was a good neighborhood, saw it go downhill, and lived through its rebirth,” said Tom Sr.

Barbara was active in Tom Jr.’s education at PS 107 and her personality combined with her institutional knowledge of the neighborhood allowed her to help bridge the gap between old and new Park Slope.

Tom and Barbara married on November 11, 1990. Tom Jr. was born four years later. Barbara first coached side-by-side with Tom when Tom Jr. began pee-wee baseball at age 4. Tom and Barbara parented through sports and became like another set of parents for all kids they coached. They coached baseball continually from 1994 to 2012 and were preparing for the 2013 season when Barbara suddenly passed away.

Barbara enjoyed sports growing up. “Back then, there wasn’t a lot in the way of sport for girls — or anyone,” said Carl Manco, longtime friend and owner of Sport Prospect. “But she was out there playing with the rest of us.” She refined her love of baseball (Mets) and football (Giants) as her relationship with Tom Sr. grew.

he availability of sports for both genders grew exponentially thanks in large part to Tom and Barbara’s joint interest in sports and active volunteer work.

“In 2001 I invited them to join the SFX Youth Sports Board,” said Javier Rosario, who until recently was the president of SFX Youth Sports. “Barbara become treasurer of SFX in 2004 and remained in that role until her untimely death.” In addition to serving on the board with Javier, Tom and Barbara coached Javier’s son in baseball and flag football and made a positive impact on his life.

“Barbara and Tom have been with SFX longer than anyone except Javier,” Carl Manco added. Current SFX Youth Sports president John Piccard noted, “her influence is larger than SFX as other leagues copied our successful programs.”

To give the neighborhood more opportunity and to help children develop a love of football, Barbara and Tom proposed to SFX Youth Sports the idea of starting a flag football program.

“The board was initially less than enthusiastic,” said John Ceffalio, a fellow board member. “But Barbara and Tom said they would do all the work needed to make it successful.” Barbara and Tom become co-commissioners and the successful inaugural season kicked off in September 2007.

Cathy Lau-Hunt, commissioner of Holy Name Father’s Guild, was thrilled about the flag football program. “When she and Tom started the league, it was a dream come true for me — finally a league that played flag football in the park that I loved!”

The program was an instant success. Javier praised Barbara’s nurturing touch in an article he wrote for New York Family Magazine about the then-new flag football program. He quoted her about why she does it:

“It’s a lot of work to put together,” said Barbara, “but one day I was on the field just watching the kids play and I realized that all the hard work was worth it… it was a good feeling!”

As if all that volunteer work and coaching their son’s team weren’t enough, Barbara and Tom took on a young flag football team. “Her motivation was to try and do the right thing for the kids in the league,” Cathy said.

None of the young Chiefs knew Barbara or Tom before they were placed on the team. Elisa Wallman Jacques, a parent from the young Chiefs said her son “had the good fortune of being bumped off the first flag football team he was on and landing on a new team that Tom Henderson decided to coach.” Barbara knew, as every prospector knows: what’s left over is gold.

Another parent from the young Chiefs, Sheila Cecil, agreed. “Tom and Barbara, with no kid on the team, took these guys under their wings. They were successful.”

Tom and Barbara continued whole-team parenting by enlisting Tom Jr. and his older Chiefs to mentor the younger Chiefs, providing learning opportunities for all the kids. Elisa said, “there was clearly a special relationship between Tom Sr., Tom Jr., and Barbara — a shared love of sports, coaching, and enjoying doing it together.”

Thanks to Barbara, flag football is now synonymous with fall in Park Slope. John Ceffalio said, “Today, I can’t imagine Prospect Park in the fall without flag football.”

Barbara will be missed. Cathy reminisced, “In my mind’s eye, I will always see Barbara Henderson in her jacket, her hair flowing down, watching the football games in Prospect Park. I will miss my friend dearly.”

“The outpour from the community is overwhelming. So beautiful,” said Tom Sr.

Barbara is survived by her husband, Tom Sr., her son, Tom Jr., her mother Dorothy Marucci, and her brother, Joseph Marucci.