2 min read

Jammin’ in the Wind


(Photo courtesy of GerritsenBeach.net)

If you were to ask Bay residents what the most scuzzy, shady and nefarious business on the waterfront was, I’m sure more than a fair share would point their fingers to the Windjammer Motor Inn on 3206 Emmons Ave. The hideous motel has garnered quite a reputation over the years, with accusations of activities including prostitution and peeping toms (or peeping pigs, in some cases). On the suggestion of a friend, I decided to look up some of the online reviews of this hell hole, and the results were beyond hilarious. Below is the best of those reviews.

Top awards go to this romantic chump on Yelp.com:

For an all too brief moment of rekindled passion, I delved into the wondrous caverns of your nether region, and dug deep to unearth the core of divine ecstasy itself.  It had been three months since you left.  On this night, you showed up at my door, speaking the language of aged scotch and false promises.  I was only too happy to accomodate your deceitful ways.
You escaped into the unforgiving chill of a bitter cold Sheepshead Bay night.  Leaving me to foot the bill for the room while you did god knows what with god knows who.   Through a thinly layered wall next to my bed, I could hear a Russian prostitute bark commands at a john.   Darkness swallowed the last remaining light of dusk, and engulfed my room in lonely shadows.  I dug my feet into the orange shag carpet and smiled.  This was the breakthrough we were looking for.
One day…soon, we shall jam in the wind once more.

TripAdvisor.com users definitely advise to stay away:

Title: “A Turkish prison would have been better!”
This is the biggest turd hole on the planet. When I opened the door, I knew I was in trouble, there was previous biologicals all over . I slept with my cloths on on towels. I turned the tv. on and it was stuck on channel 33, free porn, usually that would not be all that bad, but in this instance I was so mortified that even that repulsed me. And speaking of thin walls, I had a wake up call with a very loud women at 3 am if you know what I mean. Save your money and sleep in the alley, there will be less germs! I almost forgot the hairy mold growing in the shower.
Title: “Nasty, Dirty, Stinks, No Privacy”
it would have been much better if I did spend my night in my car. I would not let my neighbor’s dog spend the night there even if his life was in danger. The place has a funky smell, the carpet is horrible, the guest would be better off sleeping on the street pavement instead of sleeping on the bed they have for them.

While consensus with the above was found nearly everwhere, one Yahoo! user did feel the urge to speak up and defend Skankville Inn the Windjammer:

hotel with hourly rates: After reading the other remarks I had to comment. What else do you expect from a place that offers hourly rates. Yes it a hole in the wall, and yes its flithy, and yes there are a lot of degerates hanging out in front. But this is the clientale that they cater to. I have used this hotels for quickies with my boyfriend on several occassions – you can’t beat paying $50 for 4 hours.

Did I say defend? I guess that’s what that was.