Dining Review: ‘I’ll Take Some Cap’n Crunch With My $900 Pair Of Sneakers, Please’ At Kith

Everybody’s got a thing.

Sugared cereals can garner potent nostalgia for a different time; a simpler time. Kids stealing downstairs to their wood-paneled basement that they’ve fashioned into their very own Honeycomb Hideout. Eating a heaping bowl of Cap’n Crunch while watching The Brady Bunch. Sitting alone in your room after breaking up with Sally Simpson from home room, cradling your Chewbacca action figure in one hand, while spooning Trix into your mouth with the other.

With that in mind, we introduce you to Kith Treats (233 Flatbush Avenue between Dean and Bergen Streets).

The sneaker mecca-cum-cereal bar opened back in August 2015, joining Ronnie Fieg’s streetwear “empire.” Both Fieg’s Kith Manhattan and Kith Women are located in the Village.

But those Manhattanites don’t get the cereal bar along with it. Walk into the front entrance of Kith Brooklyn, hang a sharp left, and sugared cereal lovers may very well experience a glucose-induced nirvana.

So what’s this combo about anyway?  “There’s the Seinfeld thing,” Fieg tells GQ – referring to the comedian’s love for both cereal and Air Jordans. “But it could also just be that most New Yorkers don’t have time to get up and cook.”

Let’s give you a bit of a breakdown of the options you have at Kith Treats — and there are oodles of them. Fieg gives the stars of the streetwear industry, the football field, and other friends of his an opportunity to “design” their favorite combo.

So if you’re a fan of the Giants’ linebacker Victor Cruz, you can enjoy the concoction he calls “The 80” — Frosted Flakes, Rice Krispies, Snickers Bar, waffle cone, and almond milk.

You also have the option to design your very own combination. And here’s what may push you over the edge: you have a choice of milk or ice cream with your cereal. Craving ice cream, Fruity Pebbles, and Cocoa Puffs? No problem, here.

Now once you’re done unfurling your space-age looking packets and swanky minimalist white carton, have a seat at the benches towards the front of the store (nb: there aren’t many of them, and this place occasionally gets mobbed when certain sneakers get released) or take it home with you to enjoy while watching Mary Tyler Moore or Taxi.

We went with Ronnie Fieg’s combo called … well … “The Fiegster” ($9.30). He’s concocted a perversely decadent melange of Frosted Flakes, Cocoa Puffs, mini marshmallows, crushed Oreos, and whole milk. (Why skimp with skim?)

And damn if it wasn’t freaky delicious. Oh, did those marshmallows tickle the incisors while the softened Oreos bathed the gums in chocolate-y delight. The denture-causing Cocoa Puffs kissed the roof of the mouth while the Frosted Flakes gave your tongue a Tony the Tiger-like hug. Man, THEY’RE GRRREAT!

While stopping in for our sugar and liquid lunch, we happened upon two friendly self-described regulars, Shawn Hoke and Kate Nyland. These are the two that you’d like to hang with you in your Honeycomb Hideout.

“I’m an ice cream aficionado,” says Nyland, who always comes in for an ice cream combo. “Either Fruity Pebbles or Cap’n Crunch, it depends,” she says.

“I always get the same thing,” says Hoke, a bit sheepishly. That’s because one of the women behind the counter recognizes both him and his order. He’s a fan of Cap’n Crunch with Kit Kats. “She knows what I order, but I always try to mess her up,” says Hoke.

Now your visit to Kith would not be complete without a lap through the store. Shiny, organized to a fault, and designed by the architectural firm Snarkitecture, street shoes are really the main course here. And while the cereal combos cost under $10, you best have a collection of Benjamins in your pocket. “Here are the $400 shoes, those are $900, and those are $1000,” explains one salesman.

Don’t worry, that’s not per shoe. That’s per pair.

Kith can be quite the scene on the weekends or when a new shoe gets released. “When the new Kobes [Kobe Bryant sneakers]  came out, it got pretty crazy in here,” says one salesman. “There was a line around the corner for those.”

One gentle suggestion for Kith: for the sake of your customer’s health and well-being, please hire an onsite dentist.

In short, Kith serves as comfort food, but not necessarily for the soul.

But hey, everybody’s got a thing.

Dining Review Rundown: Kith Treats
Where: 233 Flatbush Avenue between Dean and Bergen Streets
Phone: 347-889-6114
Regular Hours: Mondays-Fridays: 9pm-8pm; Saturdays, 10am-9pm; Sundays: 10am-7pm
Kid Friendly? If it’s quiet, you’ll be fine with a stroller or toddler. But if they have a shoe sale, it’s simply not a good idea to bring the little ones.